I know it’s way past Valentine’s day, but this was something nice i came across.
I do not know you, my darling
Or if you are in my life.
Though on this day, I will confess,
I wonder about being your wife
People are flocking to the stores
Men and women pass me by
Flowers and candy are bought
Despite the prices oh so high
Cards are flying off the shelves
Praising a "significant someone"
While I, on the other hand,
Receive not a one.
God, by His grace, is keeping me
Along the straight and narrow.
I am reminded that difficulty comes
But joy will arrive on the morrow
Being one of the few without a beau
Certainly isn’t easy
The world screams at me, "You’re nuts!
Your love life is measly!"
I am aiming though for something higher
A love that is so true
It’s a story of God’s greatness that I want
Something only He could do
May the gift I give you right now be
A life of modesty
A servant’s heart, a sister’s love
An example of purity.
No matter how long it takes
I’m committed to waiting on God
I will not seek to be your girl
Until I get His confirming nod
Lord, you have read my heart. May you always be my first love. And may you keep me true to my future spouse until the day I say, "I do."
I finished my work! Woohoo! Such a burden off my back *grin* Now all i have to do (gulp!) is to swallow my humble pie and go to college tomorrow to get my work assessed. Ahh..still. I sigh with relief.
Do you want to know a weird fact about me? That’s okay, i’m going to tell you anyway.
I hate coloring with color pencils. Unless i really don’t have a choice, i’d rather color with paints, all sorts of paints; oils, acrylic, watercolors, ANYTHING compared to color pencils. I hate the effect that pencils give to images.
Well, this past assignment was a coloring pencil assignment. Explains the procrastination now, eh.
Okay! I will do my work. I will be a good girl and be responsible. I will go to college tomorrow, even though i don’t have a class. I will do all this happily and joyfully, because it is the right thing to do. I will not go out, even though i have many invitations (i’m a happening person =p). I will stay home and color til my eyes pop out but i will do it. And lastly…
I shall stop blogging cos well, if my fingers are on the keyboard, they can’t be holding my pencils, can they? -.-
I wrote a post earlier, but i couldn’t post just now and the post is lost, so i’m gonna post about this. It is such a sweet story.
Silver Lining to Gray Clouds
by Steve Watters
I spent most of last week in North Carolina with activities surrounding the funeral for my mom. She just turned 60 last month and I’m sure she wouldn’t have died so young if my dad hadn’t died at the young age of 56 a few years ago. There was probably a lot more that could have been done to treat the physical problems she had, but even when she said otherwise, it seemed she wanted to go on to be with my dad.
And so on what would have been the fortieth anniversary of their first Valentine’s Day together, we buried mom beside dad in the graveyard behind the church that they started.
Just before she died, mom sat up in her hospital bed, looked into the distance, laughed and said, "hey" — as if she was being greeted by someone very familiar.
This story, along with the incredible outpouring of love and support from family, from the church and from the staff here at Focus on the Family offer a comforting silver lining to the gray cloud of my mom’s death.
But it is still a cloud. I appreciate how passionately C.S. Lewis grieved the loss of his wife even though he held on to the hope of a reunion in heaven. I’m reminded again that God did not originally create humans to experience the separation of death. That is the gray cloud of our fallen state. And the pain and great loss of death continues to weigh on us all.
The primary silver lining that gives us all hope is that Christ has ultimately conquered death and holds out to us the promise of an eternal life that will swallow in magnitude the all-too-short chapter of our time in mortal bodies.
Ever wonder about the Pharisees? I do. They were the religious leaders of their day who spent their lives studying Scripture. With so many prophecies about Christ how could they have missed it? They were so “close” to God yet they didn’t feel a prompting that Jesus was the Christ. I could never understand it–until I went to Bible school.
In modern day I think Bible School students could fit in to the category of "Pharisee" in that they study the Bible, and then some go to work for the Church. A very dangerous thing I found that happened all too often at Bible School was that some of the students would study Scripture and neglect their relationship with God. Their knowledge about God grew but their knowing God deteriorated.
This isn’t just how some Bible school students are–this applies to a lot of Christians as well. We attend church, midweek meetings etc. yet neglect our relationship with God.
We become more like Pharisees than Christ. And our likeness to the Pharisees does not stop there. Jesus spent time inside the synagogue, yet he also spent time in the marketplace, on the hillside. The Pharisees, on the other hand, sat inside the synagogue, and then spoke badly about Jesus, and judged him for hanging out with the sinners.
Who are you like?
Do you hang out with the sinners in their environment? Or do you sit inside the Church and judge the Christians who are, in fact, acting like Christ? If Jesus were here now, would you be one of those who would stand on the side and speak badly of him and judge him for hanging out with the sinners?
I’m not implying that people should drop out of Bible school. Even people not attending Bible school should be studying the Word. And I am not trying to say that people should not go to church. Jesus spent time inside the synagogue, but He also spent time outside the synagogue. A lot of Christians sit inside the Church and won’t go outside and talk to the unsaved.
I remember sitting in a class at Bible school one day and the lecturer asked who has unsaved friends. Half the class put their hands up. The lecturer then asked if it was a small minority of friends who were unsaved. They said “yes”. I was the only one who could say that I have a lot of friends who aren’t saved, yet.
How can we expect to impact/have an influence in these peoples’ lives when we are living in a bubble? People judge me for hanging out with non-christians, but they don’t see the heart behind it. People don’t know that I’ve made my self accountable to someone. They don’t realize that I’ve actually gone to my school’s leadership to ask if going to clubs can be my ministry.
Many don’t see the emails I’ve sent out to people asking them to pray, and to get involved. They don’t see the change in the people I’ve met. They don’t see the amount of people I’ve spoken to about God. They don’t see the Bible I bought for someone, or when I look after the girls who are so drunk that they can’t look after themselves. They miss the tears I’ve shed, my heart absolutely broken for these people. Seeing them so broken and hurt that they hide what they really feel in drinking, not wanting to face reality, putting it off for tomorrow when they’re alone and sober.
All they see is that I hang out in clubs. They see a glass in my hand and assume it’s a vodka mix rather than water.
I’m sick of excuses for why people won’t go out and talk to the unsaved. I thought that was why we are here.
I know that a lot of people are against going to clubs – which is why it is so hard for me to find people who will go with me. I realize that some people can’t go because of the temptation for them. But for the others, where in the Bible does it say “stay out of clubs” ? Yes, the bible says to be in the world not of the world–that means do not blend in with the world. It does not mean to separate yourself completely from the world.
Where does God want you? I’m sure that He would want some of you reaching out to the club scene. Not going in and bible-bashing but building relationships; looking after the drunk people, making sure that the dehydrated people throwing up in the bathrooms get some water; making sure people have a lift home, or calling them a taxi to make sure they get home; stopping guys from taking advantage of girls that are practically passed out; making sure that people whose drinks get spiked get medical attention. Not relying on temporal things to make you happy is a rare thing, and it is noticeable.
My heart is for those people. Therefore, no matter what people say about me, no matter how many people judge me without actually knowing the truth, no matter how many people make assumptions without checking the facts, I will never stop going to clubs.
I know that my life is making a difference. And that makes it all worthwhile.
My son has a habit that I love (and several I don’t love, but they aren’t at issue here). When Nathan is concentrating or confused, he plays with the hair right in the middle of his forehead. He scratches his hairline, or gives his locks a little tug, as if physically stimulating his head will inspire his brain to a higher thought capacity.
Yesterday morning, Nathan came in to my bathroom while I was putting on my make-up. (By the way, does anyone else have trouble talking and putting on mascara at the same time? I can’t concentrate on anything else when that wand is in my hand. But again–not at issue here.) With one fist shoved deep in his pocket, and the other scratching his head, Nathan started, "Mom, ya’ know how God is infinity?"
"Yes." (We’d discussed a few days earlier that God is eternal–that He has been around forever and will remain forever, too.)
"So I was just thinking about how He created the world, and I was wondering, like, WHEN He made it, and then I was like, ‘Wait! He’s been alive forever!’ So do you think He, like, waited awhile before He started creating everything, or–wait! That doesn’t make any sense because He has been here forever! And (scratch) that just sort of makes me feel a little, like, dizzy."
I told him I knew what he meant–that I can’t get my mind around how big God is, either. And I said something I’d read–that, if we could explain everything about God, then He wouldn’t really be God. We shook our heads, baffled by God’s bigness, and Nathan said that he’s definitely going to ask Him that one when we get to heaven.
Nathan bounced out of the room and left me to finish my make-up. I grabbed a toilet paper square to stop a few tears from messing up my fresh mascara, and breathed a prayer for my son: "Let him always be awed by Your bigness."
Fast-forward to yesterday afternoon. I attended a class on our "beliefs" as Christians. Wouldn’t you think that after all these years of following Jesus, I’d be familiar enough with the topic? I have a Bible college degree, for heaven’s sake. But, no. I left that class feeling just like Nathan: completely baffled by God’s bigness, scratching my head, and a little, like, dizzy.
Imagine how big God must be to have created the universe. The truth is, none of us really know exactly how He pulled that off, even though we debate the details as if we did. From mountains to molecules, from this beautiful earth to the countless other worlds beyond ours…He made it all from nothing. Yeah, I’m definitely going to have to ask Him that one, too.
And consider, as we discussed in my class yesterday, the sheer number of thoughts that God must have. At once. At all times. God knows that I’m breathing right now. And He is also thinking about your breath, and your neighbor’s breath, and the breeze outside, and the rotation of the earth, and an infinite number of thoughts that we don’t even think to think He thinks. Dizzy yet?
But here’s the truly huge part: God’s love. God simply is love. He made an amazing world, let us choose our own way in it, and then made an unbelievably gracious plan to restore what we messed up. That’s love. That’s grace. That’s enough to make you scratch your head and fall on your face in worship.
Sometimes I forget. Sometimes I’m too wrapped up in my selfish little world, having tiny thoughts about my wants and worries. Sometimes I think I know all there is to know about…everything. But I am finite, and God is infinite. He will not be contained, and He cannot be explained. His world, His thoughts, and especially His love are big. Very big. It’s good to scratch my head in baffled adoration. It’s good to feel a little, like, dizzy.
the small print says, "Connect the dots…and make this heart whole."
I’m on a journey at discovering what exactly Lent is…feel free to add your opinions and comments. I notice i’ve gone all over so many topics just discovering Lent. Maybe instead of fasting, i’ll devote the time of Lent to discovering what it is, why we should do it, and how should we do it (all this in light of God’s plan for Lent). Yep, i think that’s a good idea.
Lent is?
(more…)
Yeah i know, more rainbow stuff, but they’re so…exciting to look at! You can probably guess that i’m a hoarder, i hoard things that look nice, pretty…things that inspire me, things with nice memories attached to it. Looking at things like these, i don’t know, just make me want to create nice things too, like start crafting or take a nice shot or two.
A starving (okay!) not-so-starving artist, a fashion student, a crafty cat, a FunkyMonkey
I do not presume to know about a lot of things. I merely wish to promote good discussion about some topics that tickle my curiosity. I may be right or i may be wrong, but then, that's my prerogative, isn't it? *grin*
